Two weeks into my no-buy/low-buy shopping pause

Temptations
Shortly after I declared to the world I was going to pause my shopping, be more mindful and try to cut extraneous expenses out of my life for a year a bunch of life happened. Good life (insert big smile here) but life. I was on track to be debt-free, at zero, net worth positive on my birthday. The bills have settled, and for now I think I can recalculate my debt payment plan. I'm still going to do the 365 days of shopping pause.
Not surprisingly, the spending gremlins snuck into my brain. Yesterday was a great example of what I hope the shopping pause can help correct. I knew I couldn't buy anything yet I still spend over three hours looking at and tempted to get various things. Oh, the shopping ban has just started, this is okay. It's only x dollars, and you're going to get it sometime soon anyway; why not get it now? If you really want to stick to a whole year, just buy this thing now. etc, etc. I'm pretty sure I spent so much time looking because 1) I was tired and 2) I suspect my subconscious knows that will-power can only last so long and eventually I'll give it.

Success
Good news! I actually didn't buy anything yesterday despite all the temptations! I am also very proud of myself for not giving in on any of the 12+ halloween day only sales and products. That was ... unexpected and hard.
Some of the things I did was to
-Calculate the exchange rate and how many hours of work the item would be
-Close the browser windows after emptying my shopping card
-Look in the stores for what I want without any money/cards telling myself I can come back
-Put the phone to charge and go to another room in the house
-Whine to someone about how I want to buy things
-Think of something I would want more that I already paused on
-Look at how much stuff I have now; think if I have something that already fills that role
-Decide when I might be able to buy that item without any guilt (ie I'll get a new cover when it's time to replace my planner or if it breaks; I'll get a sample of that make-up item when it's time to order an essential item, I think I can make it this year without replacing my x clothing item, wait until you've lost the weight and then replace with something nice you love that will last)


A Plan
I've decided that to really stick to my shopping pause I need a good start. I want a goal to get me focused to aid in preventing slip ups. I know it's going to happen, I know life is going to happen. But... I have a goal I've wanted for several years now. Debt-free.
If I trim all the excess (which is going to be really hard with the holidays upon us) I think I can be debt free on my last pay day in February. Four months from now. 117 days. I only have to stick to only essentials (no make-up, stickers, outside coffee, clothes, non-essential kid stuff, etc) for another 117 days and I'll be at the start again. Only 117.

So that's my mantra this week. 117 days. I can do this.

My one year low-buy

Because I heart my birthday, I'm going to start it now.

I have allowed a bit of wiggle room. I think I'll continue my Hello Waffle and Glamour Doll Eyes subscription until December before cancelling, and I will be keeping one of my subscription boxes (either Birchbox or Topbox and they both renew in December). I may try to get another Glamour Doll Eyes OTM, but I'm not sure about this.

What I will stop buying as of Today (October 17th) for the next year is:
-Make-up (except for replacements of unique categories like foundation, primer, mascara)
-Nail Polish
-Clothes
-Shoes
-Kitchen items
-Books
-Any of the other millions of temptations I have

I will not intentionally stop buying planner stickers for the entire year, but I do intend on waiting until march before I select more. I am writing this in advance and assuming a certain shop I follow sticks to the release schedule posted I will make one more planner sticker purchase today, and if the Femme Fatale goosebumps part II collection is out, that will make its way to me. I am going to continue to spend the next couple of months monitoring my spending before establishing a formal budget. I also expect there will be slip-ups but I hope not for a while. I think if I reduce my exposure to social media and when I do use it to come with a feeling on contentment with what I have that I can change my feeling of "gimmie!" to one of appreciation without brain altering desire lust.


What is allowed?
-a new planner or two for the next year
-replacement make-up listed above
-reasonably timed haircuts as I forgot how nice this feels
-reasonable replacements for things like shampoo and soap
-savings for a vacation next year
-currently coffee and takeout food but this may change after my couple months of monitoring. I'm currently quite good a limiting my intake and use of these sources
-Two race entries
-Activities for the kids, presents for the kids, and reasonable clothes for the kids


Why?
I want to realign my finances with my values, build an emergency fund, set a good example for my children and force myself to see some areas where I might lean towards hoarding *cough cough indie eyeshadows cough cough*. I also want to be better to the earth, more mindful with my shopping and consumption and build myself back up from the start. I also want to enjoy what I have, and I think that might come from having less. I want gain control of my spending. I want to get my old habits back of exercise, eating healthy, work/life balance and financial responsibility. I want to be the mom my kids are proud of. I am hitting restart. I want to me.

If this sounds nuts to you, and to me it sounds a bit crazy to be internet posting it (doesn't everyone do this sometime?) here's a recent article on how to choose your own financial adventure. In the context f that post this could be my re-declaration of option one as I hope to out of debt by the end. Assuming I get out of debt I'll essentially be renaming my debt repayment plan budgets to low-buy in order to start the saving train. I'm looking forward to it.

What's going on?

Although I have over 50 posts in draft from (and images probably for another 10 on my phone) I haven't been posting. The majority of that comes from pure frustration and deciding that my laptop had completely bitten the dust. As technology moves so fast, it doesn't make sense to me to replace it until I need to replace, especially when I'm paying off debt like a boss. I'm very lucky and my job was held for my during my shorten maternity leave, and I don't require my laptop for income. My readership of.. well, me doesn't mind that I'm late on posting.

I then was evaluating my spending habits, and I'm sure I do have some posts that made it past draft that included my intentions of going on a "no-buy", which started with No Buy July. During this I noticed that I used my blog (which was very needed to help me feel like I had a brain) as an excuse to buy pretty shiny things. I do love swatching, but do I need to spend an increasing amount on samples (thank you exchange rate woes) just to post on my blog so that I have it for inventory when so much of my make-up is already unloved?

So what am I up to? Am I going to blog? Well, to be honest it amuses me when blogs just drop off with no warning, or have a big update post and nothing ever again. I was looking forward to doing that. However, I have found my blog very helpful for directing me for financial decisions like continuing with Ipsy or breaking up with Luxebox. Reviewing the images and/or reviews of the products later helps take away any emotional feelings and see if the items are still relevant to my life now. I also want to ramble about my goals, financial and otherwise. So maybe I'll disappear, maybe I'll just be tossing up images of stuff I buy, maybe I'll run regularly again, or maybe I might actually take the time to review something more akin to how I would want to see a blogger do it.

xoxo



And for something totally random, here's a stick shop that I like to throw my money at. You should too. :0)

How long does it last?

Mostly a note to myself for recall :) And a note to update this as I think of things.

Shampoo and condition : replaced in late January, conditioner depleted, shampoo almost empty. Estimated 4 months per average size bottle. This week for five days, each shower has been "the last use of the shampoo bottle". It still has "one more" use left. 

Sample Baggie of eyeshadow: one week with daily use (darling girl still at the nerd table, my pretty zombie bride, hello waffle artificial) 

Sample of blush : two and half weeks. Yup, I used my full sample of happy ending from my May vanishing cabinet before I jump into my hello waffle blushes. 

Glitter Fix: one year(!) I'm thisclose to completely using the glitter fix from my GDE OTM last year. I've used a second one and other adhevsives but I also use this one to swatch. Let's call it even at about one year. 

Eye cream: I'm on my third sample eye cream tub and it appears the 3-4 months I use it falls close to the recommended six months. This actually has me thinking subscriptions may be the way to go as it feels like I'd never finish a cream before it "goes bad" and the smaller pots are healthier. 

Nail polish top coat: forever! I can't believe I haven't emptied one in the last year. I do switch it up, but I would have thought the mini from julep would be empty and it still seems to have lots. 

D.O. A fairly steady 3 months. I usually buy 2-3 at a time, twice a year. I actually just got a year and half (pushing the lifespan here but I think I'll be okay) at Costco. 

Q-tips: a box appears to last a year. Wow! 

I feel paying attention to my product usage can ultimately help me obtain my spending/saving goals and lead to more mindful shopping. And much less hoarding if I can fight "it's a good deal, I'll use it up, it doesn't go bad". I'm starting to see some of the worst (aka no returns for me and ultimately wasted) money I've spend is on "good deals". Recall my shoe decluttering? Mostly good deals. I have seven chapsticks I want to test out as they were "good deals". I'll buy food off my grocerry list that doesn't get eaten as it a "good deal".

I need to be frugal, thrifty and place my money on what I value. Only sometimes is that a good deal. :) 

Of shopping and minimalism; Saving and mindfulness

I often feel like this huge contradiction as I want to be more minimalist but I do like shopping (and in many ways have been trained to shop as therapy 😜).

I also want to be clutter-free (or very clutter reduced).

So why the boxes and the make-up? What's going on?

For me, when I say minimalism I mean more cutting down the waste leaving only the things I love. I come from generation of hoarders (for originally good reasons - it was hard to be a homesteader, farmer for the last hundred years) so the desire and need to hoard runs deep within in. By longing for minimalism, I think I can over come this and end up in a great happy place of tidy. Of clean and neat. I also want to spend my money on what I value, and I'm so tired of being in heaps of debt. It happened so fast (refresher, life event caused an almost $100,000 swing of finances leaving me $65,000 in debt). I've been busting my behind to get out. A couple months ago, I began the habit of emotional shopping again - which has benefited my blog. It's so much easier to write about things I've bought than things I feel.

I think for the summer I will keep up my subscriptions and cut it down to two indie make-up boxes in the fall (please help me pick!). I will continue to post my hauls. I will continue to swatch. I am going to start "shopping my stash" and pulling out more comparisons. I also want to chat more about being frugal. I going to be more mindful. I started the subscription boxes as I wasn't taking care of me, and I did not have a routine (other than brushing my teeth before bed). Wouldn't it be great to have a written remind how long products last? My plan is a couple more purchases this summer (shimmer me, the august femme fatale release, another two). I'm building a huge list of wants for my birthday, and closer to the date, I'll decide what and how much I can spend. Ideally, I will be cashing in points for presents, and not truly affecting my (very tight) budget much. I will be getting my back my laser focus on debt elimination, building my emergency fund, and continuing to work on me.

Did you want details of my "shopping ban"? Did you want to see my budget and debt repayment goals?

More interestingly, I spent about one monthly payment after finishing my final student. Do you find you have to relax, just blow some money, and not care for a bit before you can go back and do it again?

FoTD Friday!

This is a look where I think my liner worked out! :D 

Everything used today.

Inside. Nerdvana all over lid, gryphon in crease (note this didn't stay as well as I would have liked), deep moss on lower lash line. I foiled girl who cried monster and lined/tight lined and water lined. The rest of the products you can probably figure out. I've been using the balm fit to blend out my crease as it's right there and I'm really feeling that tad bit of blending actually gives an overall improvement. I will also use fade to fall for this when I remember. 

And outside. Look at that wing! Almost there. I also want to note in some angles I didn't get that wing at all. 

And there's my face. I'm hoping by forcing myself to post these every so often I can keep a record of my progress and maybe get over feeling disgusted when I see myself; I'm not fond of the extra baby weigh that is still hanging around, and I know that I'm just not a face that anyone would want to look at. 

But what do they say? Something like you have to love yourself before anyone else can?

I think it might just be dead...

Or is it? If it charges, I'll still be able to use it to read webpages or the last app opened ...

Canada Student Loans Lost My Payment

Remember how I was debating about setting a goal to eliminate my smaller student loan? As such, I made a few payments (say 5) in about two weeks time, and was planning on making two more and having this little guy gone (but a fair amount of the balance actually transferred to my line of credit which has a nearly identical interest rate). Why? Because I -was- am wanting a win. Paying off my credit feels amazing, and has kept me from ranking up the total, but it's still credit available to me. A spiral of bad decisions (or something bad happening) and it could be back up there! As soon as this once massive now wee loan is gone, it's gone!* *unless I decide to return to school, but I would really like to be debt-free before I considered additional education.

Everyday, I've been logging in and waiting to see what these extra payments will do to my balance (drop it!) and how they change my daily interest rate - something weird that has kept me really focused on dropping the balance. I notice a payment I made never was calculated! Immediately, I pick up the phone and call. After a twently minute call, they think I made the payment to the wrong account number. To prove I haven't, I have had to fax 10+ pages of my banking documents and they will "look into it". I should hear back after 20 business days.

But... I wanted to pay this guy off this month... Which I know my goal three weeks ago was by the end of December, two weeks ago by my birthday in October, and somehow it moved up to next pay check. Which is how much time I'll give them to find my payment. It will take away from my vacation, but I really want one of those loans gone! It also makes me wonder if they have "lost" any of my other payments...

Have you ever had a payment you made lost? What did you do? Did they find it?

Temptations

I keep finding myself trying to buy a few things, even though I know I don't need them, and I know I don't have the money for them. But all the items together come to less than $100, adding to my struggle that it's okay to get them. But, I still know it's not. I've been checking these things out since Tuesday:

Two head bands from Lululemon:
Mesh Bang Buster Headband in Jewelled Magenta $18
Criss Cross Headband in Wee are from space Jewelled Magenta $14

Please note I have over 30 headbands in assorted sizes including a raspberry glo (also a bright pink) bang buster. But my head keeps shouting "but it's not mesh! The mesh will be so much cooler/practical for running! You must get it!". This is my fourth day of ignoring that voice and staying strong.

I've recently starting taking care of myself, and cleaning out my old make-up. Some of what I recently threw out had been in storage for 2 years and had a couple years life before then. So the Beauty Box 5 Limited Edition Classic Hollywood Mystery Box is tempting me. $39 + $15 shipping to Canada.

You may have noticed, I'm  subscripted to a couple beauty boxes which will do just find to replenish what needs replacement. I don't need this. Even if I feel I'll be missing out on some great value. 

The most ridiculous of all is the desire I've been fighting to buy a(nother) Meme Box even though I have yet to receive any of the three I have already bought. I don't even know if I trust beauty products from Asia, and I might have a minor concern about exposing myself and my family to more radiation than needed. I'm not sure of the environmental effect of these products, I don't want to harm the earth if I can avoid it. The cost of the boxes that are tempting me $23 (or $29) plus $6.99 shipping. 

I don't need these either. But my brain is again screaming "you don't want to miss out! C'mon, it's such a great deal!". My rational side, which has been winning, is pointing out it's not a great deal no matter what I pay if I don't need it, and it might end up as clutter. Paying my debt is waaaaaay more important. 

If these do interest you, can you use coupon code: AFFILIATE-0871-P8WRC-NUYF to save $5 off your order of $100 or more at check out.

I'll be trying to resist. I'm starting to wonder if knowing I don't have the money - this week, these purchased would all be on my credit card or line of credit makes the concept of spending money more abstract. These will add to my debt. I don't know what Lululemon does, but they have brainwashed me to not even consider/mind/be bothered by that fact. I'm programmed to think "Must. Have. Cute. Headband*. Now!). I've waited four days, and I still want them. I know these items will sell-out, and likely soon.  But will it matter if they do and I don't have them on the way? 

Nope. Not at all. 

What would you be doing to keep your strength and your (digital) money in your pocket?

*exchangeable with any Lululemon product.  

My average clothing cost day

There once was a time where my work-out clothes were only for getting sweaty, and just for getting sweaty. That meant as soon as I was done working out, back they went on my shelf to be worn for the next work out (cutting down on the wear of washing) or to be washed (as who wants to stink?). Some exceptions existed, like going shopping after a yoga class, or walking the dog after a run. But there was no way I was going to wear them other wise* *Exception came into place when I was training myself to get up at 6 am or earlier to run. To limit the number of obstacles to getting out the door, I started sleeping in my run clothes. It worked to help establish the routine which eventually became something I loved.

Somewhere in the middle of my first pregnancy (I'm currently in my second) my Lululemon become casual clothes. Which also allowed me the incorrect privilege of thinking that I could purchase some work out clothes for just lounging. I even had friends promote and encourage this idea! Very strongly.

Today is a perfect example of a daily outfit. I'm pregnant again, and I'm wearing a shirt that I bought last pregnancy with intentions to sell when I was done. I kept it just in case - so can I count some savings here? I have on a No Limit Tank (built in bra) $64, a tunic from Lole ($88), Lululemon panties ($18), and Dance Studio Crops ($88). My shoes are cheap runners from Old Navy ;) . Total cost $258. Before taxes. My guess is this would be the average of what I wear. In the winter with layering, I'm probably over $600 most days. It doesn't take long with a $50 scarf and a $110 hoodie.

*sigh*

I miss the days before debt when I had disposable income. In those times, this didn't seem so ridiculous.

Temptations

My biggest temptations loves include Lululemon and Starbucks. I've done really well at slowly over several years allowing the Starbucks demon to rest. For the past 8 months, I've allowed myself a gift card on which I put money, and once or twice a month when the time is right, I can do. It's guilt-free as it doesn't affect my budget at all. Oh, having high blood pressure, then being pregnant, and then breastfeeding have gone futher to silence my Starbucks consumption than my budget ;)

Now for Lululemon. I have done great this year! Since Late February (but it's felt like much longer) I've only made (and kept) a few purchases including a summer dress, two bigger bras and a bigger tank. I've also sold over 200 of my old Lululemon items. I've decided that when my need to purchase over comes me like it did earlier this week, and thank goodness I'm awesome and fought it, I should put that money on my smaller student loan. I really want to be rid of that guy soon. So, like this week, I did something somewhat dumb - I was going to buy the clothes using my line of credit. Instead I've taken that amount and put it on my loan. I hate paying debt with debt (as I fell into that habit so easily last year and thought I was getting ahead but was actually falling behind) but it's much better than buying stuff with debt? ... Right?... right?...

I had the same experience with Julep - check out my side bar link ;) - with the announcement of the truth or dare boxes. I love the foot cream from them, but I just finished my Avon bottle, and opened that one. I needed to talk myself out of getting a second months before I needed it (assuming the kidlet doesn't use it all up in her hair). And a very pretty duo of nail colours. For these two items, I have also put a payment on my loan.

I hope seeing the physical, numerical? loss of money from my account will help me prioritize where I am putting my money, and keep me on track to debt repayment and reasonable living. I'm planning I will only need to do this one more time to get the message, because I need lots of my money for my basic expenses! I think this plan will work when the stranger test has failed.

How do you stay strong? Have you had any crazy plans to spend your money on debt/savings before you can frivolously spend it?

0% Credit Card Transfers

I have read on many PF blogs than a 0% transfer could be one of the dumbest things you do. It can also be one of the smartest.

One of my favorite bloggers recently pointed out that many credit card companies that offer the 0% balance transfer will... wait for it.. charge you the FULL INTEREST from the transfer period if not paid off in full by the end of the promotional transfer period. Eeek! I'm fairly certain that mine isn't like that "only be charged interest on the unpaid portion" but they did just send out a new booklet with a ton of revised rules that I won't have the time to thoroughly read for some time. In my case, it could be $1000's in interest.

In December of last year, one of my two (maxed) credit card companies informed me that my interest rate was going up from 19.9% to 24.9%. The balance on this card was $8800. I was barely paying it down as it was! How on earth was I going to be able to afford an extra 5% interest? I had a second credit card with $2200 (also maxed) and did you know that you can be indebted to paypal? I owed about $550 to them, and had ranked up $200 in bank frees in the process. It feels like that time was a lot longer ago then a few months.

The first credit card I applied to for a balance transfer rejected me. The application to extend my line of credit wasn't going to be approved. Weeks passed. Feeling of failure and hopelessness increased. I kept researching and trying. Then, I got a letter saying I was approved for a balance transfer. I arranged to go get my new card, and quickly transferred $10,500 on it.

I was never supposed to put any purchases on this card, but I ended up making some major payments like yearly car insurance (which I need to start saving for) and medical bills. By putting over 50% on my income on debt, focusing on this card, I was a month away from the deadline and still owed over $4000, much over my monthly income and e-bay clothing selling side hustle. I was panicking, until I calculated taking a few extra months to pay off would only cost me $100 or so. Not worth the stress I was feeling.

Or... would it? Thanks to blondeonabudget.ca, I realized I might have to pay interest! I had no idea. And recently the fine print which I thought I had read had changed. My bank was/is becoming much less friendly. I had no idea if this applied to me or not. Paying off this card in 6 months was no longer about pride, but about the mighty dollar. Which lead to a month of crazy debt payment, lots of listing of my clothes, and crying. And lots of staring at my computer screen trying to figure out how to do it.

I'm about to get my final paycheck before the balance is due. And, by putting 70% of it on my credit card, I think I'll do it! I need to see that balance hit bottom. It will be time to celebrate! But frugally :)

Parent Busy

I think everyone knows that kids are a huge life change. I used to see co-workers, or family member say that they couldn't do this or that because of the kids, and I swore that I was not going to let that happen to me.

After graduate school, I felt like I almost had too much time. I worked full-time, ran 5-6 times a week (ranging from 30 minutes to 1.5 hour runs), dropped in on sports weekly, took 3-4 yoga classes a week, kept my house sparkling, maintained my yard, walked my dog daily, would do weight work outs at home, put several hours into WoW weekly, had friends I would see often, and I would just go shopping or hiking for hours (or a full day if I was hiking). And I still had down time!

Now, I can barely answer a text message within 2 days. I feel a bunch busier, but I don't feel like I'm getting nearly as much done. Perhaps it is because I have to make nutritious meals every night. My before work runs have turned into helping keep a 2-year-old from spilling milk every where, and insisting she keep her clothes on. In place of physical activity every day, I'm spending two-three hours on bedtime starting from bath to pajamas to stories to just staying in the room training her to sleep on her own. I love it, and I love her. It is hard to see how much my life has been redefined without my say. I'm busy, but it's just not the same as before. During the bedtime routine, I can't text someone back. That would be stealing from my daughter, or placing my phone at risk to end up in the tub ;) My downtime has become the time to do chores, which seem to be exponentially larger from the tornado of toddler. Yes, she does help, and I do get her to put her toys away but I'm not going to use harsh cleaning chemicals when she is awake. I'm located farther from work, and I know I'm losing about 8-10 hours of time I used to have just by being in a vehicle. I'm working on changing this but it's my reality for now.

I know as she grows up, the balance of time invested in her will decrease and the time I can invest in myself will increase. But for now, I'm parent busy. I'm hoping my investment will be returned with a great relationship when she's 8, 15, or 22. I want a strong connection with her, and if that means I only run 2 times this week and the laundry piles up, I will pay that price.

How do you or did you balance going from being busy to parent busy without losing yourself and your friends?

Personal Finance

One of the many reasons I wanted to start blogging again is because I've fallen in love with several personal finance blogs and I love the inspiration provided, and the accountability to stay on track. I've acquired a bit of debt slowly through student loans, and then via some very unexpected life events, a large debt. A massive, heart crushing, defeating, limiting, swallowing my soul, taking away everything that made me worthwhile, debilitating debt. Or at least that is how it feels most days. I am fairly certain I will get into this in much more detail soon.

I'm very scared to start to put this out there. I originally wanted to host my own blog, but as that wasn't happening and won't be happening for awhile yet, I've turned to a easy to access blog. For reasons of wanting to be personal about my finance, I've chosen to move on from live journal - where family members and friends used to blog and know about mine until I'm ready to tell them. There are so many reasons I've afraid, I feel like I have a lot to lose. I think I might have been dawdling about starting to post about finance as I might move the blog when I have time to host my own, or maybe because I don't know what I want to focus on. I do want one place where I can post a few ideas - some finance, some shopping, some fitness, some child related, some relationship and emotion related.

So please take this as my hello, and know that I'm feeling lost, alone and pathless. I'll be bumbling along trying to find my way, and if you can ignore some of my ironies, let's see where this takes us.

-Leigh