Good bye to diapers #byebyediapers

Let's talk pee. And poop. And all things diaper. 

One in diapers, one almost out! This big kid has been ready to move onto the fully using the potty, and more excitingly, sleeping through the night with no wet spots.

Influenster was awesome, and sent me a pack to test out. Sign up on influenster.ca and maybe you can test your own!

We received a very generous pack! I like to look for deals on these and I think they are usually about $0.40 per diaper but can get as low as $0.22-$0.24 on the really good sales. Shoppers, safeway and sometime Costco has these deals.















My daughter loves the designs but didn't really catch on to the idea that if she urinates the flower, heart or butterfly goes away. I love how well the absorb at night, and if she goes a little she can get up by herself, finish on the potty, pull them back up and go back to sleep until morning. It's a great way to help her be a big kid. We also love to use them during naps at they are just like "real panties".

My turn next!

Thanks, Influenster! 

What's going on?

Although I have over 50 posts in draft from (and images probably for another 10 on my phone) I haven't been posting. The majority of that comes from pure frustration and deciding that my laptop had completely bitten the dust. As technology moves so fast, it doesn't make sense to me to replace it until I need to replace, especially when I'm paying off debt like a boss. I'm very lucky and my job was held for my during my shorten maternity leave, and I don't require my laptop for income. My readership of.. well, me doesn't mind that I'm late on posting.

I then was evaluating my spending habits, and I'm sure I do have some posts that made it past draft that included my intentions of going on a "no-buy", which started with No Buy July. During this I noticed that I used my blog (which was very needed to help me feel like I had a brain) as an excuse to buy pretty shiny things. I do love swatching, but do I need to spend an increasing amount on samples (thank you exchange rate woes) just to post on my blog so that I have it for inventory when so much of my make-up is already unloved?

So what am I up to? Am I going to blog? Well, to be honest it amuses me when blogs just drop off with no warning, or have a big update post and nothing ever again. I was looking forward to doing that. However, I have found my blog very helpful for directing me for financial decisions like continuing with Ipsy or breaking up with Luxebox. Reviewing the images and/or reviews of the products later helps take away any emotional feelings and see if the items are still relevant to my life now. I also want to ramble about my goals, financial and otherwise. So maybe I'll disappear, maybe I'll just be tossing up images of stuff I buy, maybe I'll run regularly again, or maybe I might actually take the time to review something more akin to how I would want to see a blogger do it.

xoxo



And for something totally random, here's a stick shop that I like to throw my money at. You should too. :0)

Of shopping and minimalism; Saving and mindfulness

I often feel like this huge contradiction as I want to be more minimalist but I do like shopping (and in many ways have been trained to shop as therapy 😜).

I also want to be clutter-free (or very clutter reduced).

So why the boxes and the make-up? What's going on?

For me, when I say minimalism I mean more cutting down the waste leaving only the things I love. I come from generation of hoarders (for originally good reasons - it was hard to be a homesteader, farmer for the last hundred years) so the desire and need to hoard runs deep within in. By longing for minimalism, I think I can over come this and end up in a great happy place of tidy. Of clean and neat. I also want to spend my money on what I value, and I'm so tired of being in heaps of debt. It happened so fast (refresher, life event caused an almost $100,000 swing of finances leaving me $65,000 in debt). I've been busting my behind to get out. A couple months ago, I began the habit of emotional shopping again - which has benefited my blog. It's so much easier to write about things I've bought than things I feel.

I think for the summer I will keep up my subscriptions and cut it down to two indie make-up boxes in the fall (please help me pick!). I will continue to post my hauls. I will continue to swatch. I am going to start "shopping my stash" and pulling out more comparisons. I also want to chat more about being frugal. I going to be more mindful. I started the subscription boxes as I wasn't taking care of me, and I did not have a routine (other than brushing my teeth before bed). Wouldn't it be great to have a written remind how long products last? My plan is a couple more purchases this summer (shimmer me, the august femme fatale release, another two). I'm building a huge list of wants for my birthday, and closer to the date, I'll decide what and how much I can spend. Ideally, I will be cashing in points for presents, and not truly affecting my (very tight) budget much. I will be getting my back my laser focus on debt elimination, building my emergency fund, and continuing to work on me.

Did you want details of my "shopping ban"? Did you want to see my budget and debt repayment goals?

More interestingly, I spent about one monthly payment after finishing my final student. Do you find you have to relax, just blow some money, and not care for a bit before you can go back and do it again?

My debt update

Another one bites the dust!

As of the end of the month, I'll be able to pay off my final student loan. :D

It's been 9 years since I graduated from my undergrad and 5 since my graduate degree. I suspect it would have been in better credit rating interest to take a few more months to pay it off, but I think the feeling of finally getting it done is more important.

That means, I'm down to two major debts. A personal loan and a line of credit. I want to get networth zero. I want to start rebuilding. I want to be a great role model. I want to feel the freedom (and pride) of getting myself back. I want to build my emergency funds.

The orders from .. my spending spree are almost done arriving. It's kinda beautiful a bunch of short and long TAT's can make a couple splurging week last months. I think I'll have a few more haul posts, then hopefully I'll get to reviewing and comparing it all. I also hope I'll be able to step up more work out game, and share that too. It's great to go back and read what I thought. It's what I will be relying on as I want to (and need to) cut my subscriptions down. I think I'll be cutting the major boxes but for the one that is prepaid, and I'll decide after June which 1 (maybe 2) indie subscription box I will keep. I think I'll let my quarterly boxes go, and I'll probably decline My Maven until my birthday. It's going to be a time for me to see which products I have and see what I can use up.

After I start getting this weight off via debt, I hope I can lose weight too. I am dying to sort my clothes, but I am not ready to admit this is my true weight. It must be less. I want to be what I weighted before. My plan is then to continue to declutter, aim for minimalism and focus on my wardrobe. More on this later.

My aim assuming I can sell some more clothes, stick to a very lean budget, control my spending impulses (hello much less time on the internet!) is that I pay off 70% of my line of credit before my birthday. Stretch goal? All of it.

Then I'll just have to focus on the last debt before I start gunning for savings.

xoxo

2015 goals - Part 1

I had written these down on a sticky note that my toddler took away and hid. I've been thinking about these goals since, well, mid last year so I should have them down pat. Side note, it's nice to be over the flu. *fingers crossed*

1. Pay off student loan. $11,000 to go. I'm hoping to put $1050 on this monthly (over half my current pay) and my tax refund.
2. Pay $5000 back on my personal loan.
3. Have $6000 ready to pay back my pension.
4. Put $800 in my GIC RRSP, $600 in my mutual fund RRSP
5. Contribute to my emergency fund. Not sure of target numbers yet.

I've got a couple of personal goals - mostly running
1. Run a 10 km in May
2. Run a half marathon in August
3. I want to lose 30 more lbs by October
4. Decide if we will have baby #3 or not

I want to set work goals but I'm not sure. I don't know *if* I'll have a job soon (HR says I will - but I've learned to no trust HR) and I don't know if I want return. I don't know if I want to look for a job prior to. I don't know if I want to continue trying to get into a new field like I was. I'm full of the "I don't know" and I'm sure baby-brain does not help. I have some part-time jobs I want to apply for but the cost of childcare may make these meaningless. I have some additional ideas once I have a direction set.

Back to the financial. My focus is or at least was going to be goal #1 - results in my student loans being destroyed. I know these are "good debt" but I'm just getting sick of carrying them around, and I don't think the very minor tax credit I receive on the interest portion is worth the icky feeling they coat my soul in. I'm hoping to put $1050 on this monthly (over half my current pay) and my tax refund. However, my husband equivalent has thrown us a challenge. We're engaged! Now that I'm a bit over just being annoyed he wants to side track me from these goals, I've been planning a shopping ban and selling spree (I have the draft posts to prove this) and I'm so worried once the spending doors open, there will be no way to shut them. Our primarily budget is $5000 which partially adds to my "why didn't we just go to the courthouse and get it done there prior to our baby being born" frustration. I was very clear I wanted this, but relationships involve some compromise, and I guess he just had to do it this way. Despite all this, I am starting to get excited.  I have no idea what this is going to do to these goals, but I'm going to leave January for tracking spending after the birth of the second baby, and February to analysis the results and.. build a wedding budget after we set a date? Or do you book a place first? Or find the person who will complete it?

What are your goals? Has life already thrown you some curve balls? Did you forget to post your yearly goal recap before posting your new goals too?

Anxiety

It's amazing how much time just being sad can take up. I had a rather large moment of anxiety this morning. I thought it had only stumbled on a few moments of my day. The clock, however, indicated that over one hour of my precious morning time had been stolen. In the words of the Price is Right: "That's too much!". I'm concerned about what will happen to my finances, my relationships (including with the boyfriend and my daughter), my job, my routines, etc. when I begin maternity leave. Which could be any day now... Scary!

I feel like I am starting to get a good financial plan in, and I've been chucking money into my savings, hopefully to prevent me from having to use any credit until my EI comes in. I am also aware I can't do a complete budget until then, so I am thinking wisely, and make mental notes of what is a "need" and what is a "want". This can sometimes leads to spiraling because there are so many things I need to buy (food, gas, certain child care items, daycare, minimum loan payments, RRSP contributions, ...) and so many more that I want to buy (subscriptions, more food, birthday presents, household items, organizational items, ...). This sometimes leads to negative thoughts spiraling as I tend to focus on how I may have picked one or two "wants" in place of a "need" eventually becoming something along the lines of "I am such a failure, I don't deserve anything including happiness or respect. I am nothing but my failures which indicated by the amount of debt I have, and how little I am putting towards it". It can get as dark as "I don't deserve my child, she deserves someone better to be her mom.". Worse of all, awful negative sentiments from my daughter's father from when he wanted me to abort the baby will enter my mind and they are the most untrue and hard thoughts to get out! Keeping in mind that I have been put over 50% of my salary on debt, paid off $10,000+ credit card debt, and dealt with some major life changes in the past 24 months, I should have nothing but confident I can do this.

Obviously, I haven't been able to cope as effectively as I would like. I do not want to keep wasting my time (and likely my health) worrying this much about my financial future. I think I need to re-employ a few tasks that have helped in the past.

1. Set aside time for worry
2. Start journaling my worries
3. Follow with a list of three great things in my life
4. Focusing on the moment, and all the things I might be missing.
5. Revise my thought patterns. Stop spiraling before it begins.

For example, I am trying to turn it from.. "I am so in debt, I can't afford anything" to "I'm so thankful, I have had a change to pay off as much debt as I have". Or change "I wish I could buy that. Why did I make so many mistakes" to "I've made some hard choices, and I'm very glad I paid extra on my line of credit this month". Or "I'm going to be in debt forever. I should give up and buy this. Why does it even matter?" to "I'm not going to let myself still be paying off my student loans when I'm 40. I'm going to crush those suckers!".

Most of the time, I really do feel lucky. I am going to be proactive to make sure it stays most of the time. Life is beautiful. I intend on seeing it that way.

Are you able to tell when you anxieties are starting to interfere with your life? How to do change it around to focus on the good?